School is almost out
for the month and I can’t help but wonder what I should do with my spare time.
There are many topics that I want to cover that I think about but I don’t
actually write down. It’s as if I mentally write about it then I realize that I
haven’t actually written it down.
My friends have
talked to me at different times and I keep meaning to write about them on this
blog. I lost a flash drive so I lost some of the entries that I wrote.
Hopefully, with all this time that I have, I can keep write up more entries for
you all.
The neat concept of
a travel blog is that even when I go home, I can still write about my hometown!
Yes, to people of my hometown, that can sound boring but to people in the
Philippines, writing about what I do at home is a new experience to them. Lately,
I’ve been living my life and not writing about it. I tend to forget or I’m too
tired to ‘not’ write in poetry form.
I want to thank
those four consist readers who read over my poems despite me not writing actual
entries! You all deserve a gold star in my book! Although, I do not hear from
any of you, all of you exist to me and your presence is know which is all that
matters! Thank you for your loyalty as readers.
Last week I wrote
about Mother’s Day and how family cultures are different depending on where a
person is raised or not raised. Today, I want to bring back up the meeting with
the Tuan Thailand band and introduce to y’all people that I met two weeks ago
on Friday May 10th!
Last month I got to
experience a concert of a Thailand band called Tuan Thailand. I got to be part
of the concert but more importantly, I got to meet to interview the bass player
of the Tuan Thailand band. Through this interview, my world suddenly shook.
Even though Win, the bass player of Tuan Thailand, had been never met me until
that moment, he didn’t judge me for not fitting his description of a Filipino.
To him, I was a
Filipino but something about me was different. He couldn’t quite place why I
sounded different and slightly acted different from the Filipinos he had
experienced up to that point but he didn’t think of me as ‘not a Filipino’
which is bias thought of most Filipinos when they find out that I cannot speak
Filipino or Tagalog. It was that moment, when Win looked at me and conveyed
that I was different not incorrect that my world turned upside
down.
It did not occur to
me that I wanted to fit into the society around me. I hadn’t realized how out
of place I felt until he made me feel in place. Thanks to Win, I took a step
back and saw that it wasn’t that I wasn’t accepted into society as a Filipino…
I was asking the wrong people to accept me into society as a Filipino.
Well, I hadn’t
exactly asked ‘God’ or anyone for help but I had to sit through a guidance
counsel session after a two weeks because it was required of each class to
visit the guidance counsel. The guidance counsel then tried to figure out if we
needed help in a specific area or they would try to get us to understand the
few others in our counsel session. Luckily, I got my best friend and two other
girls that I didn’t feel ‘close’ to but they weren’t my enemies.
After the guidance
council meeting my world was still in pieces. I knew that there were people in
the society who accepted me for who I am but I was still shaken that it took one
interaction with a stranger for me to see that my standards for myself were not
aligned with my values. These people I wanted to be accepted by would never
truly accept me no matter what I did so I needed to refocus on who was important to me and whose opinions
actually mattered.
On May 10th,
I met a group of people at KFC. I saw two dark skinned people and a white guy.
I was standing in line behind them and listened to the white person’s accident.
He wasn’t from America or from Europe, so what did that leave? At the time, I
couldn’t quite place it. The two black people that were with him also didn’t
seem like Nigerians. Their hair was different and their style of clothing
looked familiar. Finally, I built the courage to present myself.
I said ‘excuse me’
then proceed to ask where the white guy was from. Australia, he declared. Of course! I thought, mentally face
palming myself. How could I not remember that? The Australian was glad that I
had picked up on his accent and that I didn’t assume he was American. It was
ironic because I am America. He said
that most people assume that he’s American and can’t understand that he’s not.
I knew how that felt.
“It’s just that…” I
smirked. “I’m also not from here. I’m actually from Texas!” And at that moment,
the black guy standing next to him got excited, “Right on!” He said and held
his hand up for a high five. I set my hand on his to complete the gesture but
wasn’t entirely sure why he got excited. “We’re from Texas.” He said with a
hint of southern twang.
That made my heart
light up. No wonder they didn’t seem in place to me. While waiting in line, we
talked and began to know each other. I found out that the group had met because
they were all Jehovah’s Witnesses. It was dangerous territory to express my
opinion on religion so I did what I could to explain myself in the most neutral
way. I am neutral to religion and I’m willing to listen to each one but that
doesn’t mean that I will declare myself as someone who is only under one
‘religion’. In truth, I take the lesson I learn from each and apply it to my
life and they didn’t judge me for that.
On Sunday, I
returned to Vigan (I had gone to Labayug to deliver something to my auntie) and
asked them if they were free. I was happy to find out that they were available
and I got to meet an addition to their family. There was a father, son, and the
mother of the son. Since then, I’ve been able to get along with them very well
and I talk to them about my experience here in Vigan and how it’s different
from the states.
This family is very
good at listening and they all have interesting stories themselves. I’m glad we
can sit at the table and talk as friends without having to bring religion into
the picture 24/7. It’s an American quality that I miss. Through this family I
was able to find people who could understand me in a Filipino sense (the mom is
Filipino and is also dark skinned so she knows what it’s like to be treated
less than what she is) and the father and son understand the foreign issues I
go through. They know about the bias opinions and prejudice because they
experience it as well.
Even though I’m not
religious, I have to say that these past two months have paved quite a path for
me. I strongly believe that what is meant to happen, will happen, and because
of that I’m excited for this new friendship that I’ve made. I may not be their
religion but I’m open to learning about it.
In truth, I’m
interested in learning about psychology, philosophy and religions and I’m
thinking about starting a journal over it. It’s an idea and I hope that I can
follow through with it. But, for now I’ll stick with my poetry and this blog.
Thank you for tuning in
this week! Tune in next week to read more!
DJ/Cho/Nar
P.S: My Teacher Apptitude Test Score was a 'High Pass'! Meaning, 90-100 score rating where 100 is perfect!
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