Tuesday, November 13, 2018

10.13.18 (Part 1 of 3)

Part I
  I’m not on board on how the school’s extracurricular activities are run. If some of you are reading this and you’re from the Philippines you’re going to think that I’m not accepting ‘how you do things in the Philippines’. And yes, that’s exactly it. But, I’m going to do what I’m told even though I don’t like it.
  In the Filipino culture everything is done as a community. Which means, if you do not participate (if you are not being part of the community) you get punished. The reason why I’m not on board with this is because this country already struggles financially. There is a gap between rich and poor. There is no middle.
  People who decide they don’t want to participate get fined. I’m going to use Socialization Night as my first example. At the time, if a person was an officer of any organization in the College of Teacher Education they were required to pay P300 and they had to attend the Socialization Night. Even if they did not attend, the officers had to pay the P300. Why?
  If one of you in the Philippines is reading this, I don’t want you to approach me and tell me, “Because that’s how we do things in the Philippines.” That’s not enough explanation. If someone has barely enough money to go to college and cannot make it to an extracurricular event then why punish them? That person will not be able to pay the fee. Because they’re poor.
  Filipinos are last minute. I’m glad that I learned to get away from that habit. It’s stressful, especially if the community depends on that organization or that person. What I don’t understand is that even if a person is not interested in being a member of certain organization in the CTE (College of Teacher Education) they are in it.
  Again, I will reference Socialization Night. I was planning on going without being required to go. However, I was later informed that I had to go to Socialization Night because I was an officer. That killed my vibe on wanting to go to the event. I went, but to be honest, I could have saved that P300 for meals between me and my cousin instead of investing in the Student Council’s event.
  Many of the students, especially first years, didn’t want to pay P300 because they still owed money on books, on their uniform, on some bill that they needed to pay for school. And I understood that. The officers of the Student Council were not happy that the first years (who were not officers) did not want to participate. P300 is a lot here. Especially for an entrance fee. To give a perspective on how much that is…
  At a karenderia (mom and pop restaurant sort of) I can spent P20 on my food and P10 on water. That’s P30. I could but 10 meals verses going to this Socialization night. Now of course, I’m also paying for my cousin so technically, this would buy is 6 meals because if there are two of us it averages to P50 per meal although it’s not always.
  It aggravates me that there is hardly any planning in this country. My uncle has shown up in Vigan, without warning, then got upset that I was not available. Uh, yea. You didn’t tell me that you were heading this way. And I sort of have class. So… It’s not that I’m trying to avoid you… It’s that you decide insert yourself into my schedule and that got upset because it didn’t work.
  That incident made my uncle not like me because he is the authority over me. I’ve never been able to sync with authority. I don’t rebel… I just don’t bow down at a moment’s notice. I would do horrible in the military. I need to know why I’m bowing. I need to why this person is above me. And the reason of ‘just because’ has never been suitable or me.
  The way my family functions on my mother’s side is split into three responsibilities. Who is going to take care of Inang (The world literally means ‘Mother’ in Ilokano but she is my grandmother), who will be finically responsible, and who will be in charge? In the previous generation the people are… *I have made up names so that they do not feel as intimidated by me talking about them. Filipinos are very prideful but it’s also to respect their privacy* My Uncle Krilo is in charge of taking care of Inang. And because of that, he is not allowed to be the responsible one.
  Financially, my mother is the one responsible for everyone and I have never supported this idea. In the Philippines it is culture to give back to the family. That, I do understand. But first, in order to give back, a person needs to take care of themselves. I hate to say this, but I’m more finically literate than my own mother. There’s a word here that they use to describe ‘giving back to the family’.
  What I understand is that, as a Filipino I need to help my family out. I get it. That’s a community based rule. However, a lot of times, many people who are in the position that my mother is in, don’t know how to spend their money. Or, the people who are receiving the money are not using it efficiently.
  I had no idea that my family did not own a vehicle in this country! What? Twenty-one years of coming to visit and it wasn’t until I live here that I learned the real issues they’re going through. When I was younger, I would get upset about this whole situation. Why is mom giving to the Philippines and not taking care of herself? I learned from her that I need to take care of myself first.
  My mother has a habit of stressing over any and everything. Which is why I don’t tell her everything. I tell her important details but in the family here, everyone tells her everything. That allows her to worry. And I try my best not to let her worry about me. Back home, I didn’t turn to my mother for help unless I really needed it. Half the time she would ask me to go to store with her so that she would buy me things that I didn’t ask her for but she felt that she was being a parent by doing this so I let her.
-Part 1 of 3-
I try to keep each of these post to a 1k word average which is why this is part 1 of 3. Tune in soon for the part 2. Thank you for keeping in touch. You guys are awesome. Love you all,
DJ/Cho/Nar


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